My church is doing a series on finances right now, and it is so obvious to me that God is trying to speak to me. I have been feeling so guilty lately, because let me just say this quickly, "I am a selfish, spoiled brat." Ugh, that hurts me! I really am though, and it is not something that I like about myself at all. I feel entitled to have things. I have this picture in my head of how life should be, and I expect it to be that way. Mind you I am married to an extremely frugal and needs minded man, and I am very grateful for that. Jeff keeps me in check quite often! I have been praying lately, and have several friends praying for me, that I will really get a grasp on my finances especially in the area of needs vs. wants. My husband does not think we need to eat out often, and I am sure many people would agree with him. However, if it is quick and convenient I am all for eating out. I know it isn't healthy, I know I could make it better at home, and I even know that you never truly know what you are eating when it is served somewhere other than your house. None of this stops me. Yesterday I was at McDonald's. I ordered a large coke and a cinnamon melts. While I am sure this was a delicious, I would not know. I forgot to bring my money with me. I never forget my money! Heck, I didn't even have a debit or credit card on me. This is so not like me, but I know God was trying to tell me I didn't need those 770 calories and 19 grams of fat, and I also didn't need to waste my money on anything that unhealthy. So today I conned my lovely husband into bringing home some Chinese food. I ordered vegetable egg foo young, which I absolutely LOVE! I took a few bites and realized they gave me shrimp egg foo young. YUCK!! Now, I do like shrimp, but I am very particular what shrimp meals I will eat. Shrimp egg foo young is not one of those meals. But I still had a fortune cookie right? Sure! So I tear into it, and what do I read? "It is not the person who has too little, but the person who always craves more, that is poor." Amen to that! It may have taken me a long time to get to this point, but I am realizing that I don't have to have everything I want, "keep up with the Joneses," or spend every penny that we earn. I do, however, need to remember that everything I have is God's, and I can not take it with me. Here are a few verses that I have found especially helpful lately.
But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. ~1 Timothy 6:6-10
Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. ~Matthew 6:19-21
Yours, O Lord, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the majesty and the splendor, for everything in heaven and earth is yours. Yours, O Lord, is the kingdom; you are exalted as head over all. ~1 Chronicles 29:11